A different kind of day

Had an "episode" last night whereby I had to call that special phone number and play back whatever was recorded on the heart monitor! The rapidity of my heart beat awakened me from a dreamless sleep which lent me a sense of foreboding that something was not quite right! Once my heart settled down into its regular irregularity, I was able to gather my senses and make the required phone call and let the monitor tattle on my errant pulse!

Apparently it wasn't anything too alarming to whomever was listening on the other end, because the nice lady told to me everything is okay and I should go back to sleep! That was comparable to my telling Miss Freckles to not try to catch the errant squirrel which pesters her every morning!

Today, after imbibing my morning coffee, I made a trip of about 65 miles to be "fitted" with a cane. Somehow I wasn't able to compute that a cane had to be fitted to me! I thought a cane is a cane is a cane, right? Wrong, oh great Beagle Breath!

After viewing quite a large and varied selection, I asked "Do you have anything with more of a feminine look - like maybe in pink or red or blue, anything but black?" I reckon what I needed is a sturdy, clumpy, very senior citiizenish, black, adjustable cane. Then, I was taught how to use the durned ugly thing! Wasn't aware there is an art to using a cane - but I always try to stay open to learning new things (even at my advanced years!).

After graduating from cane-using class, I was sent on my merry way with the following advice: Your cane is now your best friend. I will have a hard time explaining that to Sally, my bestest friend in the entire world! Don't think she will like being usurped by a cane!

However, in the short time that I've been supported by my new best friend, I am more than grateful to have it. Walking is much less painful for me, which is wonderful. I will have to work harder, though, at not gripping the curved handle so tightly - may develop "cane elbow" or might even develop much-needed muscle tone.

Prayer answered

Isn't it wonderful when a dear friend calls to share good news with you? A friend's happiness is enough to make me want to holler, but the town is much too small to withstand the sonic boom!

One should be very careful when requesting prayer from me - he/she should be SURE that what he/she asks for is what he/she really wants! It's always delightful when the requestor is amazed when he/she gets what he/she requests! Ambiguous enough for ya? (sitting here chortling)

Congratulations, friend! Your happiness is highly contagious - made my day, for sure! Can't imagine how high you must be flying today - and without benefit of an airplane!

Compliments versus Smoke Blowing!

Sometimes it is difficult to ascertain whether someone is paying me a true compliment or just blowing smoke up my skirt! Know what I mean?

Speaking for myself, whenever I give someone a compliment, it is truthful and from the heart. I don't know any other way. If I'm asked "Do you like this dress?" and I don't, I say so! That way, there's no opportunity for me to lie or the other person to wonder what I mean! My bluntness has often gotten me into very hot water, but backing down is not an option.

If I tell someone "I admire you for your honesty and forthrightness," that's exactly what I mean! If I tell someone anything that is complimentary, it is because I mean what I say and I say what I mean.

Someone once told me "You are beautiful." Now, that was definitely a case of having smoke blown up my skirt. NEVER before nor after that day has anyone referred to me as beautiful! Even my own brother, when telling someone else about his sister, would say "She ain't much to look at, but she's got a nice personality!" Now, that was a truthful compliment that I've cherished for a long time!

Today I was told how wonderful I am, how good I am at what I do, and that I'm NEEDED desparately! Yeah, right! Like I'm the only person in this world that can do or be needed? And the person doing the telling went on to say that OTHERS also think I'm irreplaceable! Think I should invest in a special mask to wear to prevent myself from breathing in all this toxic smoke!

Everyone enjoys receiving a compliment, including me. But, a truthful compliment means so very much more than out and outright flattery that doesn't contain one iota of truth. A kind word is complimentary to me - it's as good as receiving a bouquet of flowers. In fact, I've said ever since I can remember "give me my flowers while I'm still alive - flowers at my funeral won't mean a thing to me." When my kids tell me they love me, when I'm told I'm a good and true friend, when I receive a thank you for something I've done for someone ----- these are compliments I hold dear to my heart.

Will someone lend me a fan to clear the smoke out of my house, please?

Explanations

First: Didn't throw a pity party after all! Got to thinking that things COULD BE a lot worse. I'm gonna get better - albeit slowly - and why should I feel sorry for myself anyhoo? I'm safe in my home, have food to eat, pay my bills on time, home and car are paid for, and life is good!

Second: Touch lamp turning itself on mystery solved! Electrical circuit for heat pump is on same one with garage - utility light on outside of garage clicks off when heat pump turns on and touch lamp turns on when heat pump turns on! How to fix that, I have no idea, but now have touch lamp hooked to extension cord to another part of house and no more mysterious turning on of lamp. Gremlins begone!

Third: Not gonna worry about extranious problems over which I have no control! Been worried about Company D and the fact I can no longer serve (possibly for as long as six to eight months) as a viable member - laid that aside and feel better for it. Not gonna worry about family members any more - they've got their lives to live, as do I, and my influence ended when they moved out! And, surely not gonna worry about being alone anymore. Just gonna do my dead level best to live one day at a time and let what's gonna happen - happen!

Fourth: Excited about getting to meet the fair damsel who was rescued this past weekend. Also, excited about the turn my friend's life has taken. His happiness has made its way into my heart, which is powerful stuff!

Fifth and Final: My apologies to those of you who may have read my previous post for being such a wuss! I'm tougher than that - just forgot for a while, that's all.

Everyone's invited!

This is not a good day - I've been a very bad girl. But, I must add right here and now that I had an enabler! I smoked a complete cigarette this morning.

Here's what happened: Without having any coffee to get me jump started, I showed up at doc's lab for what I thought was an 08:30 appointment, but it wasn't until 10:10. So, they kept me there to do a bone density test - once a year I have that done. While doing the scan, the doppler showed something the technician didn't like and she forwarded image to hospital for IMMEDIATE READING. Meanwhile, I was sitting in an exam room suffering from "over imagination syndrome," as well as the need for a cup of coffee (and thinking how good a cigarette would taste with it.)

After about 30 minutes, I was taken to the "ghoul room," as I jokingly call it, and had blood withdrawn and peed in the little plastic cup! The lab technician, a very good friend of mine, asked me why I appeared so nervous. Explained what had happened with bone scan, that I'd quit smoking, hadn't had any coffee yet, and my blood pressure was probably completely off the scale! She took me outside, whereby she and I both lit up - and my conscience didn't bother me one single bit. In fact, I calmed down even more after she brought me a cup of coffee from the break room. I would have asked her for another cigarette to bring home with me, but thought that would be rather pushy of me.

When we got back inside, the doctor appeared (as if by magic, 'cuz he is never seen on lab days!) and took me into his office. He explained to me that I have a slight fracture in my pelvis, which explains my inability to march, sit in a certain position, stand for very long, or walk like I used to without hurting BADLY.

Don't have any idea how it happened - but after having many x-rays, it seems that it is a fairly recent injury. Doc explained one doesn't have to fall to fracture one's pelvis - a bad step up or down stairs, on uneven ground, or getting in and out of a car and twisting incorrectly could have caused it. Nothing can be done - it's gotta heal on its own!

Then, had to take the heart monitor for some fine tuning - seems the batteries were about dead and new ones hadn't been included in the mailing. Last reading I forwarded by phone was total garbled nonsense - comforting to know that I could very well have been having a heart attack and nobody would have known it. Can anything else happen to set me back?

Took out some of my frustration after getting home and got the front and side yard mowed - not sure how good a job I did because it was rather hard for me to see through the tears! There are definite advantages to living out in the country - I can holler at the
top of my voice and nobody gives a rats butt 'cuz nobody can hear me.

I'm gonna have a pity party for myself - don't have any alcohol with which to drown my sorrows and no cigarettes (why I didn't stop somewhere on my way home to buy some, I will never know) on which to puff happily, but I do have my French Vanilla cafe and double stuff oreos. So, if y'all come, it will be BYOB! And, for heaven's sake, don't try to fix me up with anyone to round out the numbers!